Love... Chance or Choice?

By Author Unknown

When we meet the right person to love when we’re at the right place at the right time, that’s chance. When you meet someone you’re attracted to, that’s not a choice. That’s chance. Being caught up in a moment (and there’s a lot of couples who get together because of this) is not a choice. That’s also a chance.

The difference is what happens afterwards. When will you take that infatuation, that crush, that mind-blowing attraction to the next level? That’s when all sanity goes back, you sit down and contemplate whether you want to make this into a concrete relationship or just a fling.

If you decide to love a person, even with his faults, that’s not a chance. That’s choice. When you choose to be with a person, no matter what, that’s choice. Even if you know there are many people out there who are more attractive, smarter, and richer than your mate, and yet, you decide to love your mate just the same, that’s choice. Infatuation, crushes, attraction comes to us by chance. But true love that lasts is truly a choice.

A choice that we make.

Regarding soulmates, there’s a beautiful movie quote that I believe is so true about this:

“Fate brings you together, but it’s still up to you to make it happen.”

I do believe that soulmates do exist. That there is truly someone made for you. But it’s still up to you to make the choice if you’re going to do something about it or not. We may meet our soulmates by chance, but loving and staying with our soulmates is still a matter of choice we have to make.

We came to the world not by finding someone perfect to love BUT to learn how to love an imperfect person perfectly…

I want to believe in miracles

How does it feel like to have found someone whom you’ve spend your entire life searching for and one day, you wake up and find her lying on a hospital bed hooked on a ventilator?

If there is a God out there, how can He be so cruel and let this happen when there are so many evil, inhumane beings out there who are alive and well?

Where is the justice in all these?

Yesterday at 4-something in the evening the doctor told my cousin to be prepared as her daughter might not make it through the next 24 hours. I just don’t understand how someone can be brain dead and yet when you talk to her, her heart beats a little faster and tears can roll down her face.

It’s now more than 24 hours – perhaps she is waiting for her boyfriend to be there by her side, to kiss her and wake her up from her sound sleep.

Ange, remember the day your daddy left and how sad you, your mommy and brothers were? Your mommy needs you to be here. She’s lost your daddy already and she can’t afford to lose you. You are a fighter since you were a baby so please be strong, hang on in there and don’t you ever give up.

Prove the doctors wrong.

They may think that they are smarter than the rest of us and at times, they might actually be insightful but bear in mind that doctors are only humans, just like us.

And prone to making mistakes, just like us.

They are not and will never be Gods.

“Dum spiro spero (While I breathe, I hope)” – Latin proverb

XOXO,

The law of the garbage truck

I got told off by one of my clients today. Yes, in case you are wondering, working in a service-oriented industry sucks. Big time. It's unbelievable how office politics can get so ugly in some companies and the victim this time, unfortunately, happened to be someone out of the company: me. She (sadly, women are extremely prone to mood swings, more often than not) didn't even want to hear my explanation.

Perhaps she's having menopausal depression.

Or maybe she didn't get any from her husband last night.

Kudos to her for ruining my whole morning – Thursdays are supposed to be one of my favorite days of the week, after Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Wednesday; in that exact order.

I would also like to take this opportunity to retract my apology for the following reasons:-

(1) First and foremost, I am adamant that I didn’t do anything wrong

(2) If she has done her job in the first place then this wouldn’t have happened. I find it extremely amusing that this thought has never crossed her mind.

(3) Last but not least, people who behave like a**es do not deserve any apology. After all, we don’t go about saying that we're sorry to donkeys after accidentally stepping on their tails, do we?

But then again, I remembered this forwarded gem that I received in my inbox not too long ago:

Law of the Garbage Truck by Author Unknown One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. He was really friendly. So I asked, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.' He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so... love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don't.

I guess I shouldn't take it personally; after all, I'm much better than that.

I ain't no garbage collector,

Generation naming explained

Got this from one of my ex-colleague via e-mail today. She’s such a doll as some of the stuff that I received from her in the past really lets me take some time-out during work. [I hope my boss is not reading this!]

Normally will forward it to the people I know (and am fond of, of course) but sometimes I will missed out a few (Too many friends, what to do?). So I’ve decided to post it here from now onwards.

Well, at least you don’t have to actually hear me go on and on and on and on in every single entry here.

Wait a minute, did I just heard a sigh of relief???

Original author/ creative director unknown

The Silent generation: people born before 1946.

The Baby Boomers: people born between 1946 and 1959.

Generation X: people born between 1960 and 1979.

Generation Y: people born between 1980 and 1995 .

Why do we call the last one Generation Y? I didn't know the reason until today - a caricaturist explains it eloquently below...

As they say: A picture is worth a thousand words!

Melly rhymes with smelly,

“Choose what you like, like what you choose.”

Do you know what it feels like to be stuck in a rut - when you know that you are supposed to make a choice and yet you hesitate?

That’s exactly what I’m feeling now.

I want to move forward and yet, I am afraid to make a decision in fear that it would turn into a disastrous one.

Deep inside, I know that I don’t want to be stuck in this situation forever because I am no longer happy with it. I may be able to lie to the whole world but I can't lie to myself.

It’s not supposed to be this way and I do not want to end up like the people that I used to make fun of.

God, I am such a coward.

I guess I just have to be brave and face my fears. After all, I am a rational human being. Well, at least that’s what I think I am anyway.

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be.

“We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.” – Carlos Casteneda

I don't need another alarm clock,

Sorry seems to be the hardest word

Sometimes in the spur of the moment, we say hurtful things and a nanosecond after the words came out of our mouths, we are filled with regret but then the thing with words is that you are unable to take them back.

The damage has already been done.

I do that a lot, especially when I’m provoked. Although at times when I look back, I realized how foolish I was. But I still find it extremely hard to apologize, particularly in situations where I think I wasn’t the one who started the whole drama.

I’m stubborn that way.

~~~

Late this evening I received news that my cousin’s daughter has just been admitted into a hospital. She has already been sick for quite some time but then suddenly fell unconscious.

She is only 18.

~~~

On occasions, we get angry at someone we love due to petty issues. It never occurred to us that if we did not say “I’m sorry & I love you so very much” at that point in time, we may never get the chance to do it ever again; be it tomorrow, the day after or for the rest of our lives.

Is it worth it to put our egos in front of everything else?

“There’s one sad truth in life I’ve found
While journeying east and west –
The only folks we really wound
Are those we love the best.
We flatter those we scarcely know;
We please the fleeting guest,
And deal full many a thoughtless blow
To those who love us best.”

- Ella Wheeler Wilcox

I’m sorry,

You make me better

During my single heydays, I used to ask myself why I was still single and if there was something about me that repel the guys around me.

I don’t have BO

I don’t have a breath that smells like rotten tomatoes

Neither do I walk around in a Hunchback of Notre Dame posture nor do I look anything like him

I have yet to weigh more than my refrigerator

As time passes by, I have also learned to accept the fact that I may not be anywhere near the following in this lifetime:

As pretty as Singaporean blogger Dawn Yang

As skinny as Kate Moss

Has a body to die for like J.Lo

Call me old-fashioned but I still think that beauty exudes from the inside. I know, I know it sounds like a consolation statement coming out from the mouth of someone who doesn’t look like Jessica Alba but what’s the point of looking drop-dead gorgeous when behind closed doors you are a backstabbing, conniving & pretentious b*tch? After all, beauty fades with time.

Although nowadays with Botox and cosmetic surgeries it seems that we humans are in fact capable of stopping time.

And when my man entered my life, he made me realize that I may not be as good as I thought I was. I’m not saying that I initially thought that I was flawless but he actually made me see so much of my imperfections (in terms of attitude, of course, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING???) that it actually bowled me over.

By that time, I was already starting to doubt “How can someone possibly ever want to spend the rest of his life with me?”

The thing is that I have lived independently for a long time and even when I was in relationships, most of the time; my ex-bfs just let me be, well, me. I do what I like, say what’s on my mind, behave the way I want, etc.

In summary, I am a selfish being.

And I always hold the belief that we should accept the person we love for who he is instead of trying to change him into who we want him to be. That’s why when he came into my life; I found it difficult to accept that he was trying to change me until one day, when we were arguing about one of my antics, he said “Do you think that I go around complaining about others? I only do it because I truly care about you.” (The actual truth is that he does complain a lot but I’ve also learned when to talk & when to shut up)

So you might think after the incident I would have miraculously transformed overnight and we would have lived happily ever after in the magical castle. Let me tell you that you thought WRONG because me being the stubborn-headed pig is still struggling to change her habits.

But then I looked around and realized that there are a lot of people out there who are, well, normal human beings, just like you, me & Dupree; and they seem to thrive in their relationships so I don’t see why I can’t do the same. (How kiasu!)

So I guess no matter how much I hate to change, I have to start learning how to embrace it for my own sake, for him and for our future together.

“A soul mate sometimes enters our life as someone to stir us up, to hold up the mirror so that we can see ourselves more clearly and antagonize us and make us so uncomfortable that we have to change because we can’t continue to look at the same thing because we’re looking at it clearly now." - Richard Vogt

“I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved, and the rest is up to the person to realize your worth.” - Author Unknown

She loves me for me,